2004-11-04 - 7:47 p.m.
oh someone please help.
kiddo isnt back from Cali.
He just called saying he may move there later.
i dont think he has told me anything more saddening in my life. I already want to cry and he isnt back, and gone again!
Portfolio turn out tommrow.art club meeting.printmaking frustration.
Had a strange 3 way lesbian kiss dream. weird.weird.weird. My halloween party went great except i passed out for 3 hrs. (not cool) but alas was a fun night
Feel like cutting my hands off.
hope my portfolio impresses someone (i doubt it) Im so crazy right now.
i wish i was a little fragile beautiful figurine that comes alive at night.
wouldnt that be grand.Oh to be a figurine.Ive lost it.I think Ive utterly lost it. Its no one's fault but mine own. I can always look up at Andrew Wyeth and dream my own world. Where everything is a little mystery to all.All Xcept for me. I can feel my hands begin to get tired. My eyes sore from the light. My ears always on and never off.Where my objection lies i will never know.Even though i am tired i feel like i could go on as a robot and countinue typing endlessly.As if it were a mental focus to keep typing rather than paying attention to what my body says.I want new everything isnt that surprizing .? (NO) I think im getting a JOB for christmas ( no not the bible character) a real job. i havnt had one of those since like 2001. Where.where.wehere. i guess i'll apply a few places. I think resturant is the way to go. Tips.Or a bar?(no i dont know if i cant handle that crowd for that long.It may just drive me insane.) And may corrupt my beautiful mind :P
Im thinking of Xmas already.OMG.
I dont know what to get myself for xmas.
I new camera.Upgrade my computer.(that would be a new case (maybe w LED lights),a burner, dvd, a better Video card.Maybe a web cam. thats a lot of me money. HMMM. I already got my beautiful earrings. WOW. :) Now i just need my beautiful car. Hmm. i wonde rif im wasting my time right now.? I should BE doing homework. or more portfolio work. Ah such is life. One big staircase.
Where it will lead. I dont know.
Maybe. Maybe. I'll find someone to climb it with. But. If not. I'll run up it and watch from the top. Im already in a fixed state of mind. Please.please. let it be over soon. Tommorow. by 3pm. itll be over. itll be over. itll be over.itll be over. just keep saying it. keep thinking it. .....itll be over tommorow @ 3.itll be over. itll be over
wow. I think my diary loves. me. :) ahhh
I need to get a people counter.HONESTLY.
hey anyone. email me comments about my looney life. i'll prolly respond.
:)
janeblond69@hotmail.com
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